More reasons to drink beer

So once again I would like to share some deep and thoughtful beer ratings that I discovered on ratebeer.com. I didn't include the names of the beer being evaluated because I didn't see the point. Only one of the beers are from Heavyweight - see if you can find it. Thanks to Kevin from Paducah, Kentucky for the entertainment.

"dark brown pour with a sticky brown head. smell is nice:cognac, peanut butter and grape jelly. taste is overly attenuated red grape taste. ashy pressboard taste with an unhappy caramel finish.grrrr. for some reasoni wrote "jesus shit waffles" i don’t know what that means."

"muddy black brown pour with a grey head. roast peanut aroma. dry unswet tea flavor with the taste of model airplanes. a biting carbonation level. a lingering bittersweet berry taste."

"pours a urine tainted neon yellow with a white head. yeastastic aroma of grains of paradise or corriander or something, a really great spicy nose. first taste bites me then i compensate for the crappy mouthfeel of pine needles. lemon pear and blueberry come out in this in an bad balance for me."

"amber body with a grey white head. nose is loose and hard to catch. a bit of honeysuckle. flavor is astringent pear and balsa wood. apricot finishsomehow still smooth."

"nice fiery gold body with a lacadaisacle ring of grey head(some weird scribbles about big beer and upsetting something and trying something else are in my notes, someday i’ll figure out what i meant)penny and donut flavor with a glaze. i also wrote "jesus shit out a waffle" here too. some candy corn here."

If you guessed 'muddy black brown with the grey head' was from Heavyweight, you're correct. That is my Black Ocean.